Electric Wizard: Time to Die

Electric Wizard: Time to Die

2014

Spinefarm Records

Format I Own it on: Compact Disc
 Time to Die
Track Listing: 1. Incense for the Damned  2. Time to Die  3. I Am Nothing  4. Destroy Those Who Love God  5. Funeral of Your Mind  6. We Love the Dead  7. SadioWitch  8. Lucifer's Slaves  9. Saturn Dethroned



The Real Life Dangers of Alcohol and Punk Rock (A True Life Medical Drama)

by Dr. Jamin, MD (the MD stands for Mogen David and not Mad Dog, as commonly believed)

Because 2016 is hell year, I didn't have a car, so I carried home a 30-pack of Rolling Rock from the local convenience star  (What am I supposed to bring home for the Friday Night Record Party? A can of Hi-C?!). Once I made it to the top of the stairs I felt a sharp pain in my stomach. It soon passed and I forgot about it and got on with my night.

The following day we were having band practice (we're scheduled to enter the studio this weekend) and while I was singing TA-80's soon to be classic track, "Trans-American 80" I suddenly felt  a  sharp pain in my beergut. I lay down and felt my stomach and there was a painful lump in my deep  naval cavern (see the 30-pack of beer).  Over the week, it reduced in size and no longer hurts although the lump is still there...

I went to the doctor and it was determined this was an umbilical hernia and said I should probably get surgery for the umbilical hernia at some point, but not to be in any hurry because it's nothing too dangerous...

 So yea...Let this be a warning of the dangers of alcohol...Those 30-packs are heavy...And punk rock is dangerous too, cos if you sing it too hard you can strain your milk...

Sidenote: My band TA-80 entered a recording studio this weekend to finally lay down the final tracks for our long-demoed "Black Glitter" album. Amy is the main singer, so she usually does most of the lead vocals and because of my hernia, she was definitely doing all the vocals. We saved "Transamerican 80" (the song that gave me the hernia in the first place) for last and  sure enough, the vocal part just didn't work for her. So I had to step in for lead vocals on the verse for that song, worried that my belly button was going to shoot out of my stomach like a cannon. Everything turned out fine, though. I laid down the vocal with no pain whatsoever...

Alright, enough of my old-man maladies, let's get to the melodies...

 Oh, wait, there are no melodies on this album....Just downtuned slagheaps of guitar and ghostly howling over slow-as-shit drums...And it's brilliant! A sprawling concept album about a Satanic Panic-era murder! It's got all the necessary ingredients needed for a Geraldo Prime-Time special: Drugs! Satan! Heavy Metal! Murder! The album ends with the serene sound of a gentle stream as the water trickles around the dead body....

Again, the whole thing kinda just runs together in a long, slow river of dark sludge. Especially with the epic 65-minute length of the album and the abundance of 10-minute plus tracks.  A few things do pop out: Jus Oborn moaning, "I wanna get high before I die!" over the slow motion riff of "Incense for the Damned"(which sounds like a black, Everest-sized glacier crumbling in slow-motion).  The classic-rock noodling on the title track that sounds  like it took a turn down the wrong alley and realizes its about to be smashed...The riff at the end of "Funeral of Your Mind" that never fails to get Flipper's "Sacrifice" stuck in my head. "SadioWitch" is remarkable for its ability to fit so much haziness and bad vibes in such a short running time (and check out that plume of feedback that appears a bit before the three-minute mark).

Electric Wizard comes through again with a some of the thickest, Sabbath-iest shit out there. I still can't understand why folks are so hung up on "Dopethrone" that they can't see the dark beauty of the band's latest albums. Although, I might have a skewed perspective cos I heard all their material at roughly the same time, so I didn't get to luxuriate in "Dopethrone" for 10 years like some fans did...This album rattles the shit of my skull, at least...

Let's listen to some music...Here's "SadioWitch" by Electric Wizard. Enjoy...

Electric Wizard: Black Masses

Electric Wizard: Black Masses

2010

Rise Above Records

Format I Own it on: Compact Disc

Track Listing: 1. Black Mass  2. Venus in Furs  3. The Nightchild  4. Patterns of Evil  5. Satyr IX  6. Turn Off Your Mind  7. Scorpio Curse  8. Crypt of Drugula


I was waaaaay late to the party with these guys...They'd been churning out masterpieces of  the haziest, sickliest doom possible since the mid-90's and I was bopping away obliviously until  a late night youtube run found me in the thick of the band's discography. I can remember thinking, "This sounds like Black Sabbath demos or something..." But Black Sabbath was never this malevolent...This lo-fi....It reminded me of a sentient, venomous cloud of marijuana smoke...

So I went to the local FYE and bought a copy of "Black Masses"...Although not as highly regarded as some of the band's other albums it was the only one the store had, so I went for it...Besides, how great is that cover? 

I don't know if Anton LeVay ever played rock n' roll, but I have to imagine if he did, it would sound something like this...Deep, black guitars that churn endlessly into the void as a distant spirit wails in horror...Album opener "Black Mass" is one of the only propulsive numbers on here, after that bit of rousing rock the whole thing slows to a crawl and time loses all meaning...You can't tell if the album is overlong or if the silence after "Crypt of Drugula" is the intrusive element.

Again, I run across people saying it's one of the band's weakest moments, but "Satyr IX" is one of my favorite Electric Wizard tracks...10 minutes of a gloriously distorted, gloomy, rising and falling riff that just cycles and cycles until up becomes down and hours become minutes...One of those songs you can just get lost in forever, and when you pair this with the following "Turn Off Your Mind" (which, I swear has an honest-to-Satan vocal hook...) it's just too beautiful...

I don't know of this record is for everybody...With all the satanism, the ponderous 10-minute song lengths, the crawling tempos, ragged performances, but if you're hopelessly addicted to the Tony Iommi doom riff then there are few bands who will provide a fix this clean...

Let's listen to some Electric Wizard...Here's "Satyr IX"...Enjoy...