The Damned: Machine Gun Etiquette

The Damned: Machine Gun Etiquette

1979

Chiswick Records

Format I Own it on: Compact Disc

Track Listing: 1. Love Song  2. Machine Gun Etiquette  3. I Just Can't Be Happy Today  4. Melody Lee  5. Anti-Pope  6. These Hands  7. Plan 9 Channel 7  8.  Noise, Noise, Noise  9. Looking at You  10. Liar  11. Smash It Up (Part 1)  12. Smash It Up (Part 2) Bonus Tracks: 13. Ballroom Blitz  14. Suicide  15. Rabid (Over You)  16. White Rabbit




(Note: There's an album in-between "Damned Damned Damned" and "Machine Gun Etiquette) called "Music for Pleasure" but I haven't been able to track down a physical copy of it, so I'll hold off on covering it...Since I have a strict "only cover albums I have physical copies of" policy...



Hey, I just realized I only own every other Damned album...I have the first, third, fifth, and seventh albums (and a few compilations and a live album)....But for the record, I like "Music for Pleasure." Sure, it's probably the weakest of their first three albums, but it definitely doesn't deserve the bad reputation it gets...)

I first picked this album up when I was in my early teens...I believe I bought it for my birthday, and it was one of the first punk albums I ever picked up...The CD copy I have has that yellow cover pictured above (which I could never quite figure out...Is that a spoon? Over a napkin maybe? It's probably something super obvious but I can't see it for some reason...Keep in mind, I'm fairly retarded...), which I believe was only the cover for these 90's CD versions...The original 70's vinyl cover looked something like this...



 I've always considered "Machine Gun Etiquette" to not only be the Damned's best album, but one of the best punk albums, period.  It's diverse, featuring everything from proto-hardcore (the barreling title track, although come to think of it, the opening bass riff on "Love Song"  could also work as the beginning of an Agnostic Front song), to goth-pop ("I Just Can't Be Happy Today") to nightmarish waltzes ("These Hands"). And almost all of it works because they never lose sight of their energetic punk roots (not to mention their seemingly endless supply of sharp hooks). All this is especially surprising since the band lost their head songwriter, guitarist Brian James. It was no big deal apparently...They just handed Captain Sensible the guitar, split up the songwriting and ended up better for it...

 The highlights on this are just ridiculous...I mentioned before that album opener "Love Song" starts out like it's going to be an angry hardcore rant, but it ends up being lovely, arm-swinging pop while despite its considerable speed..."Plan 9 Channel 7" is a masterwork of gothic-punk, equally emphasizing atmosphere and towering hooks...Dave Vanian sounds like he just crawled out of a tomb to watch TV all night...Dark choirs pile atop flaming guitar solos...I'm telling you...Your life's not complete until you listen to this song...

...and oddly enough it's not even the best song on the album (although it comes close)...

I'm saving that honor for "Smash it Up," which is a made up of a two parts...Part one is a pleasant, light instrumental and part two is one of the catchiest new-wave pop songs  I've ever laid my ears on! Everything great about the Damned is present...Breathless pacing, relentless hooks, tongue-in-cheek humor...So perfect, and when it suddenly goes into half-time at the end and Dave starts to comically croon, "And everybody's smashing things down..." a lump sometimes forms in my throat...Like I'm so sad the album's ending and I won't get to hang out with my friends anymore...

Check out the video below if you don't believe me...

 

I've also always been partial to "I Just Can't Be Happy Today" where their darker pop style finally falls into place...Due to Dave's appearance, they always looked like they might sound like spooky vampire music, but on this song you get to hear it...But it's not corny dark like most of those goth bozos out there...This is fun darkness...Darkness you can tap your toe to...And it's also close to my heart because it featured in one of the most entertaining Old Grey Whistle Test performances I've  seen, where everything seems to go so wrong it's right...

Here's "Smash it Up" from that same episode...Man, you've got to watch this clip too...Rat goes ballistic and smashes his drums, Captain Sensible struggles with a keyboard and the bass part they keep playing over the announcer at the end is hilarious...

So great...Now that shit is live punk rock...I mean it! Check out a local punk show at a VFW hall sometime...You'll see lots of falling props, stretches where the guitarists are playing on the wrong place on the neck, failed keyboard solos, someone finally snapping and breaking their shit...And I'll always love how they weren't an entire band of vampires, or an entire band of uber-punk dudes, or an entire band of schlubs...No, there was one vampire, one uber-punk dude, and one schlub...

 Anyway, back to the album...The version I have throws in four bonus tracks...The gem of which is "Rabid (Over You)" which features insanely fast hi-hat hits...sis-a-sis-a-sis-a-sis-a-sis....Unbelievable... So yea...A must-have album if you're into punk/new-wave...The only weak tracks are "These Hands" and "Liar," the latter of which appears to have been written on autopilot (I lot of bands have tried but I can't think of a single one that's written a truly good song called "Liar." Help me, out...I've got to be missing one..) But those don't bother me too much because there's ten (14 on the CD) other tracks which are among the best songs I've ever heard by anybody...

Here's "Love Song" by the Damned...Enjoy...